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31 May 2018

Why I Almost Deleted Alice's Antics (And Why I Didn't)


So, here's a little story.

For the last month, if not two or three months, I've been feeling a solid 3/10 about blogging.

3/10 might even be considered too high.

And on Monday of this week, I almost pulled the plug.

I almost quit Alice's Antics. I have a whole post in my drafts entitled "The End of Alice's Antics", I almost deleted this internet space.

Because the truth is, I've been blogging for 5 years and I thought, by now, something would've happened.

I never wanted to be an "internet star", I never wanted "fame". What I really wanted, was to write.

And when I started blogging in 2013, the online world wasn't so saturated with content, BUT, people were starting to make a living from Youtube. It was the year Zoella hit one million subscribers - and it was the year the world of blogging and vlogging blew up.

Imagine being in a small room, where everyone has cookies. EVERYONE has brought cookies into the room and everyone wants to try the cookies, to find out the best ones. Slowly, more people want to join the room with their own cookies, until you're all squashed up against each other.

People don't care that you're squashed, you don't care that you're squashed, all that matters is that your cookies are the best. You want your cookies to be THE ones everyone is talking about.

But so does everyone else.

And so you're all in this room and people can hardly breathe, and yet somehow, more people are filing in with their cookies. Occasionally even, some of their cookies are new and exciting and are gathering interest.

Meanwhile, others are being shoved out, and others are deciding to walk out.

Not, everyone, can have the best cookie.

When I started blogging, the room of cookies was only half full, and now it's so full, nobody can move, people are finding excellent cookies left, right and centre, and it's basically impossible to be the best cookie creator beacause HELLO, look at all of the other amazing cookies around you.

That, is basically, how I feel.

I also really want a cookie right now.

People seem to think, blogging is easy. It's a hobby. "Hey, Alice, you don't need to make millions of pounds from your blog, because you HAVE a job, you WRITE for a job."

And those people are right in some ways. I do have a job, I enjoy my job, I LOVE writing.

But blogging takes time. It takes a long time for me to plan my posts, to think up ideas, to write out whole plans. To take photographs... and come up with interesting, fantastic, metaphorical scenarios to display my feelings - as above.

I'm heartbroken to say it, but the amount of effort I've been putting into my blog for the last year, just hasn't felt worth it. I've felt like I'm putting time into an empty void and would be much better off spending my time elsewhere.

Basically, I lost my mojo.

And funnily enough, the thing which brought back my blogging-spirit, was admitting all of this to myself.

I've always preached a lot about how you need to "blog for yourself, not for the followers", and I do agree with that whole-heartedly, but also, I want blogging to become my job. I want Alice's Antics to be a business.

I don't want to become the next youtuber with a book realease, but I do want to work for myself and do what I love, which is blogging. It's writing. And it's writing for all of you guys.

Which means treating Alice's Antics like a business. Creating plans, creating content structures and having a consistency to my posts.

Creating a space I'm proud of and can earn money from, because it is my passion, and there is a market for it now. It's a possibility.

So, I'm stepping up my game.

Alice's Antics is in a 2.0 stage, and hopefully you won't see much of a transformation, but I certainly want to make sure that I never come as close to deleting this little internet space ever again.

A huge shout out to some new blogging-pals who helped me get out of this rut, told me they loved my blog, and gave me advice on kick-starting this whole process.

I hope you all have had wonderful weeks!

Love, Alice x

3 comments:

  1. I saw your comment about this on the UK blogging group, checked out your blog, and subscribed right away. I love your blog, it's amazing! I like your cookies, keep them comin'!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. This means SO much to me - thank you so much! Have the most wonderful weekend!

      Delete
  2. I used to read your blog when you were in...Italy? Spain? I can't remember quite perfectly, but you would put a smile on my face! And that was a few years ago! So glad I stumble upon your blog again! I used to have one myself, but totally did lost my mojo...My cookies weren't good enough. I miss it...But Don't know where to (re) start.

    ReplyDelete

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