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23 January 2014

My Best Friends.

Please prepare yourselves mentally for this one, grab a scuba diving mask and take a big breath, because this post is a bit (very) deep.

In life, there are a few things I know I am extremely lucky to have. I know I'm lucky to have a roof over my head and plenty to eat and drink, I know I am lucky to have parents who support me in all that I do, I'm lucky to have gone to good schools and never felt anything is too far out of my reach, and I am lucky to have two best friends. 

My best friends don't know each other, they've never met, and the only thing they have in common is me. One, Collette, lives in Bedfordshire where I grew up until I was 12, and the other, Ruth, lives in Dorset, where I have lived ever since. In all honesty, they are completely different people and have completely different personalities, which makes them 100%, irreplaceable. 


Collette actually not-so-subtly hint at me writing a post about our friendship. And despite subtlety not being her strong point in life, I was absolutely up for it. There aren't very many things I could honestly say I can write about forever, but mine and Collette's friendship would be at the top of that list. 
We met at playgroup, aged 3. My earliest memory of her is playing some kind of dinosaur game in the playground when we were about 5, and me getting annoyed because I wanted to be a T-Rex but she wouldn't let me. From then, our little sisters, both the same age, also met in playgroup and became best friends, and our mums became friends too. Because Sarah (my sister) and Cerise (Collette's sister) had become inseparable, we never stopped being friends because we were always thrown together at parties and play dates as a four, by our parents. 

After 15 years of friendship, it is impossible to think of life without Collette. She was the first person I told when I had my first kiss, and will be the first person I tell when I have a baby. We came up with the saying a few years ago 'from Rugrats to Sex and the City' because that is exactly what we have become. We have gone from children in the playground playing chariot and talking babies, to teenagers with breakups and make ups and bitchy friends, to finally young adults with absolutely no idea what the hell we are going to do with our lives. Because I have grown up with her and due to our sisters closeness, it is impossible not to think of the Shulvers as an extended family. Even though she's not a five minute walk away like she used to be, our friendship has in no way deteriorated and we both know we don't need to constantly be on the phone or on skype every night to know that we're always here for each other. So here is your half-a-post Mowgli, thank you for your hilarity and memories, thank you for forgiving me about lying that I didn't like ham when we were 8 and thank you for being the only person to appreciate a good old Ronan Keating song as much as me. You're the best. Ever.
Me and Collette at my 4th birthday party
Skype bonding 11years later

Have you ever started a new school or joined a college or gone into sixth form and fallen into a whole new set of friends and just had to start from scratch? Because from year 11 to 12 that is exactly what I did. I decided to leave the dark bitchiness of my former friends and find a friendship group I could rely on and get on well with, without any drama. Ruth was one of the people in the group in which I fell. I have absolutely no idea what why or how we ended up speaking, but we can both assume it was down to me talking too much and her talking not much that formed our friendship. The thing about me and Ruth is that, unlike with Collette, we are the polar opposite of each other. I am bubbly and outgoing (annoying), she is dark and mysterious (scary), I like to plan things, Ruth's middle name is spontaneity, I can cry at the News, Ruth shows no emotion, I listen to John Mayer, Ruth listens to Mount Kimbie... I could go on forever. But somehow, in the midst of all our opposite-ness, we completely work as pair. It is probably due to our only mutuality being extremely important. Both like dogs. Both like dessert. And both like tragic Miley Cyrus films. 

Somehow our friendship that started as a hanging out thing, turned into an everyday thing. New Years 2011/12 Ruth was my midnight kiss, which is true friendship firming stuff. From then onward if we didn't see each other at school we would call to find out where we were. We spent our life in Costa or at my house. My parents gave her a group hug when she broke up with her ex-boyfriend. And when we brought new toothbrushes, there were 5 because Ruth had her own one at our house. She is essentially my life partner. We bicker and shout at each other and whilst travelling there were times (specifically on a 9 hour over night bus journey with no food or cigarettes) that I thought she was going to attack me. But never once did I think 'Holy f**k, not speaking to her when I get home', because Ruth is my person. And the realisation we are not going to be able to call each other every day, or text all the time, is something that fills me with 8 months of dread. I am going to be a bit lost without Ruth for 8 months.

The pictures below are of us on the night we first became 'real' friends and the last time I saw her.

I feel like it's important to remind people how much they mean to you, so this post is partly for you all to read, but also for Collette and Ruth themselves to know that even when I'm in another country they are still my favourite people in the world. I don't know what I'd do without either of them, and I am so incredibly lucky to have them both in my life. A lot of people grow up without one best friend, let alone two. So thank you girls, you are absolutely amazing and I love you both millions.

1 comment:

  1. a very sweet memory of you guys.. :)


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